Why is Rin doing what she does?

(日本語は下に書かれてあります)


She chose this path because she does not want the future generation to experience what she had felt …

Until up to 2012, Rin suffered and struggled with low self-esteem.

私が、感じたこと・経験したことを、次世代の方に体験したくないと思い、私の今の道を選びました。

2012年前までは、私は、とても低い自己肯定感に苦しんでました。


Before there was a time when …

昔の私は、、、


This was the time when …  - she had to put on a lot of make up to feel worthy and hide her insecurities  - her 80% of conversation was about guys and fitness because she wanted to be loved and feel attractive  - she sometimes had physical fights with her dad. At one point, there was a point she kicked her father from the stairways and she felt okay  ー メイクをすることで、悲しい自分・自信がない自分を隠していました  ー 私は、無意識に、誰かに自分を愛して欲しいという願望から魅力的になりたいと思い、当時の80%の会話は、ジム・異性についてしか話していなかった  ー 大学時代は、よく父親と喧嘩をしてました。ある時は、階段から父親を蹴り、なんの罪悪感も感じることもできなかった

This was the time when …

- she had to put on a lot of make up to feel worthy and hide her insecurities

- her 80% of conversation was about guys and fitness because she wanted to be loved and feel attractive

- she sometimes had physical fights with her dad. At one point, there was a point she kicked her father from the stairways and she felt okay

ー メイクをすることで、悲しい自分・自信がない自分を隠していました

ー 私は、無意識に、誰かに自分を愛して欲しいという願望から魅力的になりたいと思い、当時の80%の会話は、ジム・異性についてしか話していなかった

ー 大学時代は、よく父親と喧嘩をしてました。ある時は、階段から父親を蹴り、なんの罪悪感も感じることもできなかった


This was the time when …  - she had to go out in order for her to fill her void and feel she is not alone .  - when she was in Australia, she sometimes went to a cafe around 4 a.m. because she didn’t want to be alone  - when she was in Australia, she sometimes was not able to leave her room because she just couldn’t  - she could not “give” to people because she did not want to get hurt… she even struggled to give chocolate for Valentines to her crush  ー 夜遊びすることで、虚しさ・孤独さを無意識に取り消そうとしていた  ー オーストラリアに住んでいた時は、時々、朝の4時にカフェに行き、孤独さを忘れようとしていた  ー傷つけられることがいやで、与えることができなかったため、バレンタインの時に、チョコレートをあげることもとても苦痛でした

This was the time when …

- she had to go out in order for her to fill her void and feel she is not alone .

- when she was in Australia, she sometimes went to a cafe around 4 a.m. because she didn’t want to be alone

- when she was in Australia, she sometimes was not able to leave her room because she just couldn’t

- she could not “give” to people because she did not want to get hurt… she even struggled to give chocolate for Valentines to her crush

ー 夜遊びすることで、虚しさ・孤独さを無意識に取り消そうとしていた

ー オーストラリアに住んでいた時は、時々、朝の4時にカフェに行き、孤独さを忘れようとしていた

ー傷つけられることがいやで、与えることができなかったため、バレンタインの時に、チョコレートをあげることもとても苦痛でした


During / Before this time …  - she literally believed that everybody was there to exploit her  - she had verbally abusive partner  - she could not cook for others because it was such a big pressure for her  - she had verbally abusive father when she was growing up. She was even scared to drop a spoon. She was petrified. (Her dad was very stressed with work and was experiencing power harassment. Also, he had verbally / physically abusive teachers when he was growing up)  ー人に利用されるという思い込みが強かった  ー暴言がすごい彼氏といた  ー「完璧にならないといけない」というプレッシャーが強すぎ、人のために料理することができなかった  ー小さい頃は、父親は仕事からのストレスがあり、家族に発散していたため、常に激怒されるのではないかという恐れの中で生きていました。スプーンを机の上に落とすことも強かく、体は常に萎縮してました

During / Before this time …

- she literally believed that everybody was there to exploit her

- she had verbally abusive partner

- she could not cook for others because it was such a big pressure for her

- she had verbally abusive father when she was growing up. She was even scared to drop a spoon. She was petrified. (Her dad was very stressed with work and was experiencing power harassment. Also, he had verbally / physically abusive teachers when he was growing up)

ー人に利用されるという思い込みが強かった

ー暴言がすごい彼氏といた

ー「完璧にならないといけない」というプレッシャーが強すぎ、人のために料理することができなかった

ー小さい頃は、父親は仕事からのストレスがあり、家族に発散していたため、常に激怒されるのではないかという恐れの中で生きていました。スプーンを机の上に落とすことも強かく、体は常に萎縮してました

  • she could not allocate food on the plates because it was too much pressure for her to do so

  • 自信が無さすぎて、サラダをお皿に配分することさえできなかった

  • she could not get off from her bed because she was scared of moving since she had felt everything she did was a mistake 

  • 「全て私がすることは失敗になるのだ」と信じてしまい、体が1ミリもベットから動くこともできなかった

  • she did not talk to anybody for a whole entire day because she was scared of speaking up 

  • 人と話すことが怖く、丸一日中誰にも話さない時期もあった

  • she believed people are around her to exploit her

  • 人に利用されると思い込み、もっと自分を大切にしなくなった

  • she could not look at people’s face because she was just afraid of them 

  • 怖く、人の顔を見ることができなかった

  • she sometimes drank to disappear. She will end up crying and hitting people who came to take away her drink 

  • 消えたいために、飲むこともあった。その時は、自分のアルコールを取り上げようとする人を打って泣いていた

  • she could not apply for a job because she believed nobody would like to hire her. She felt she had no talent and her Japanese was horrible 

  • 早稲田大学に通っていたが、自己肯定感がとても低く、「自分は、雇われる人間ではない」と信じ込み、お仕事に応募することが苦痛で大変だった

  • she sometimes did not know who she saw in the mirror because it was so different from she had expected. She just hated what she saw and she hated going near the mirror 

  • 自分のことが嫌いで、鏡を見ても、自分を自覚することができなかった。また、頭の中にあった自分と鏡に映っていた自分の差が違い過ぎ、鏡に映った自分が嫌いすぎて、鏡も見ることさえできなかった

  • She felt she was extremely ugly that she would blame and tell her parents that it was their fault

  • 外見がとても醜いと感じ、親に「親のせいで、こんなに私は醜いんだ!」と怒鳴っていた時もあった

  • She was raped 3 times. In her 1st time, she felt emotional hurt and she began to believe more that nobody cared about her and she felt she was never able to belong. Also, she slowly started not to take care of herself

  • 彼女は、3回レイプされたことがあり、1回目の時は、感情的に辛かった。1回目の時から、自分をもっと大切にしなくなり、「私の居場所はどうせない」と信じ込むことになった

  • She was almost sexually assaulted when she was 18. She was sad to hear that the potential rapist (who worked at a same place) was telling people that she was a whore when she was forced even if she was saying , “No”

  • 18歳の時に、レイプされそうになったが、相手はみんなに「彼女は、whore だ」と言っていたみたいで、傷ついた

  • She was cyber-bullied: When she became a new friend, some people took the time to message the new friend to never be friends with her

  • 彼女はネット上のいじめを受け、FBで新たな友人ができ、その友人と写真を撮ると、その友人に「彼女と友達になるな」というようなメールが送られていた

  • Her partner was harassed. Her partner at that time received FB message that she is a shit person. Her partner could not mail them back because the FB account would be deactivated

  • 元彼宛にも、「彼女は本当にひどい人だ」というようなメールが無名で何回か送られることもあった

  • She was in a disrespecting working environment: “How did you go to Waseda University when you are … (stupid)?” etc.

  • 「本当に早稲田大学に行ったの?」と会社で聞かれたりしていた 


💛💛💛

Although,

she struggled with her low self-esteem,

she decided to be the creator of her life and her trajectory of life started t0 change.

💛💛💛

Because she had these beautiful experience,

she wants to support others in their journey to regain their inner power and transform their lives.

🌎🌎🌎

私は、とても低い自己肯定感に苦しんでいたけれど、この経験があったからこそ、私の人生の目的意義が見つかりました。

この経験があったからこそ、もっとみんなんが自分らしく生きられる社会構築に貢献したいという強い気持ちでいっぱいです!


If Rin was able to change,

so can you if you really want to and willing to confront yourself.

If you want to know how she did it and are serious in empowering yourself, apply for free initial session in person / online

もし私が変えることができるなら、絶対あなたも変えることができます!

自分を変えることに真剣だったら、

ヒアリングセッションを是非受けてみてください!